'My wedding isn't a showcase for your new family': Entitled parents try to guilt-trip their friend into letting a newborn attend their childfree wedding, insisting they accommodate childcare against their will

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Feb 13, 2025 9:00 PM EST

These new parents didn't realize that their friend's childfree wedding wasn't the time or place for a babycentric meet-n-greet. Unwilling to get a sitter for the best friend's big day, they thought guilt-tripping their buddy into making an exception for their situation was the best course of action. Spoiler: It was not. 

Kids can be pretty disruptive at weddings. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the company of children in small doses, but I also understand and respect a couple's wishes to keep their wedding day free of broken centerpieces, crayon drawings on the tablecloths, and mid-ceremony tantrums. If a couple decides they want their wedding to be an adult-only event, that's certainly their prerogative. After all, they're the ones paying thousands of dollars on a celebration that doesn't have to include the entire family. 

However, the new parents in this next story thought they'd be an exception on the guest list, assuming they could bring their newborn baby to their friend's childfree wedding. They even went as far as insisting it was their right to introduce their baby to all of their friends in this emotional and romantic setting. Hmm… Entitled much? 

Keep scrolling for the fallout and the details of an impasse that directly affected this one-sided friendship.

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    via Изображения пользователя

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • Hey all, I am getting married in 6 months to my partner (32M) I am (37F). My best friend (M38) moved abroad two years ago and in that time has had a baby and got married himself, all very shotgun and last minute.
    via AverageExpert713
  • Before his son was born I sent him a text message advising of our child-free policy at the wedding, fast forward to 2 weeks ago when we were on a video call, I mentioned the no children again and his face dropped, turns out he hadn't seen/remembered my earlier message.
    via AverageExpert713
  • After the call he sent me a long message asking to make an exception for his child and that his wife is so good at calming them etc.. and then proceeded to mention that his wife hasn't met any of his friends and our
    via AverageExpert713
  • any of his friends and our wedding would be a great opportunity for her to meet everyone (my wedding isn't a showcase for your new family, but whatever) he said he would come without alone if he has to.
    via AverageExpert713
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    via nicoletaionescu

    (The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.)

    As if the bride and groom aren't already stressed out planning a wedding that's only 6 months away. Now they have to juggle childcare expectations from their one entitled bestie? It was your decision to have kids, but now it's your responsibility to tend to them like an adult—not push that responsibility on someone else who already has enough on their plate. 

  • I spent days writing out a long message apologising again and making the point clear that we cannot make an exception as this would be unfair to other guests and would inevitably upset a lot of people and we don't want drama on the wedding day, I said
    via AverageExpert713
  • we would make the effort to visit him after the wedding. We also don't want children at the wedding as we are childfree by choice which he has known since I was 17. It made me feel stressed and like I'd done something wrong.
    via AverageExpert713
  • I sent the message 10 days ago and he still hasn't responded or acknowledged the position he has put me in by having to explain myself over and over that he cannot bring his child, nor has he let me know if he still intends to come alone.
    via AverageExpert713
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    via miodrag ignjatovic

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • It's his birthday next week and my partner said I shouldn't message him as he hasn't bothered to reply to my last message. I guess I am just looking for advice as to what others would do in this situation.
    via AverageExpert713
  • OffKira Funny he should say his wife is just so good at calming their child. He shot his shot, even though it put you in aa difficult position, and now he's sulking and ghosting you. So mature of an almost 40yo married man and father.
    via OffKira
  • I guess you could send him a birthday message... but it is true that your last communication essentially didn't go thru (because he never responded once denied). If you do send this birthday message, keep in mind it may be
    via OffKira
  • your last "friendly" communication with him, may as well end on a positive note so you know at least you tried to keep the friendship going with maturity. But you don't owe him this kindness - he certainly doesn't seem to feel like he owes you the decency of saying literally anything about your last text.
    via OffKira
  • Ok-Reindeer3333 You are not the bad person because he couldn't respect your policy. Did you take kids to his wedding? No.... Then he shouldn't bring kids to yours. He has a wife, presumably two incomes, he should easily be able to swing childcare. Why are people with kids so bad with money?? And people with two incomes at that?! A boundary is a boundary. Parents need to stop being so entitled.
    via Ok-Reindeer3333
  • Beth_Pleasant Something similar happened at my childfree wedding. Before I get into it though, this is not on you. He didn't see your message? The only one he didn't see was the one about not bringing his kid to the wedding? Uh-huh, sure. I don't buy it.
    via Beth_Pleasant
  • We gave all our guests 9 months (October save the dates for a June wedding) notice for our wedding. We also got a list of local childcare providers from the hotel/resort where we had a room block. It was a nice place with a
    via Beth_Pleasant
  • pool and stuff, and our discounted rate could be used before and after our wedding, so people from out of town could make a weekend out of it (most invitees were local). We even invited the kids to the Sunday morning brunch. We still had
    via Beth_Pleasant
  • people complain about it, but most were happy to have the night off and have a good time. One of my husbands friend's sent an RSVP adding all their kids, and my husband had to call them and set them straight.
    via Beth_Pleasant
  • My BFF at the time though, ended up not coming because she couldn't bring her 1-year old. It was a big thing, which I think mostly stemmed from her husband being useless, and so she didn't come to my wedding. I
    via Beth_Pleasant
  • haven't spoken to her since our last call where she told me all the help I had tried to amass for her to get from the train station to the wedding (because she doesn't drive) and back wasn't good enough because her "husband
    via Beth_Pleasant
  • can't be alone with the kid that long." How long? 36 hours. This was after I spent a ton of money I didn't have to attend her wedding in a small town that didn't even have a regular hotel. It just had B&B's and no taxis. A bunch of us
    via Beth_Pleasant
  • were in the same B&B and we couldn't go to the after party because it "closed" at 11 pm. It was a mess. But did I complain? No, I showed up because that's what you do. I didn't get half the consideration I gave her.
    via Beth_Pleasant
  • hizashiii regardless of his answer (or non- answer), you NEED to have a bouncer at the event. good chance that he or someone else still shows up with sproglings.
    via hizashiii
  • Cantdrownafish Happened to me. My best friend and his wife wanted to bring their two kids. I said no. Wife went hysterical and had a falling out and really messy one at that. I have not spoken to the wife since then, but me and my friend are still good. Your situation is a bit different because it sounds like your friend is the hysterical one.
    via Cantdrownafish
  • This is your life, wedding, and money. You do what you want to do and you set up rules. It's your friend that's not respecting you. I would wish your friend a happy birthday. If your friend is being pissy, that's one him. When he needs friends and reaches back out to you, you have the choice whether or not to care.
    via Cantdrownafish

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family drama dads famiies drama kids childfree relatable childfree wedding parenting wedding dad story family stories parent weddings parents children entitled people
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